I've been a subscriber of Crosisborg for as long as I can remember, and I've featured one or two of his videos on this very site, but I never realised that he wrote alternative lyrics to songs... and as a bonus he sings them too!

Come, bow to the awesome brilliance of...

Looks like I have some serious competition now! But it's all good, baby!

I do try to at least understand what religious people are talking about before I tell them where to go, but this time I admit defeat. Here's a message I received today:

Who's Telling, Living, Demonstrating whatever, we should, really, be doing it

Dear Mr Gisburne

Yes, did all those who've, come and gone, know your answer?

Surely you can demonstrate, your answer, with a blank Piece of Paper, by simply folding and cutting, with the ability to explain only what you can show.

The reason for this Test, anybody can say anthing, anybody can write anything, so to find out, who know's, you seem too! what we should realllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllly be doing!

Simple, just Demonstrate! the Bottom Line

Await PIctures of Your Demonstration!

Would someone, anyone, please reassure me with the knowledge that the above makes absolutely no sense whatsoever! Actually, when I looked at his YouTube channel I found a link to a web site:

Truth Revealed - Judeo Christian and the Glory of Yeshua

So the web site would explain things, right? Wrong! If anything, it is more ridiculous than the original message. All I could salvage from this idiot's train wreck of a web site is that (and I don't think I'm exaggerating here) he thinks that the path to true salvation lies through... ORIGAMI. Seriously. This page explains further (I use the word 'explains' very loosely), but for extra comedy try this one, showing a cartoon of a man with no feet with the baffling subtitle '8 Toes and Mutating, Truth Prevailing' (another WTF? experience).

Just when you think religion can't possibly throw up anything more stupid, along comes a whole new category of idiot to prove you wrong. As Cypress Hill would say:

Insane in da membrane
Insane in da brain

Anyone care to argue with that assessment? Thought not.

Given the cover of my new book, this article seems topical.

Saudi cleric favours one-eye veil
A Muslim cleric in Saudi Arabia has called on women to wear a full veil, or niqab, that reveals only one eye.

Sheikh Muhammad al-Habadan said showing both eyes encouraged women to use eye make-up to look seductive.

The question of how much of her face a woman should cover is a controversial topic in many Muslim societies.

The niqab is more common in Saudi Arabia and the Gulf, but women in much of the Muslim Middle East wear a headscarf which covers only their hair.

Sheikh Habadan, an ultra-conservative cleric who is said to have wide influence among religious Saudis, was answering questions on the Muslim satellite channel al-Majd.

Topical and of course very, very stupid. These people are idiots. That's all there is to say.

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Update:
I found the following comment, by EvocatusNL, on a YouTube video from Pat Condell, which also mentioned the 'one eye good, two eyes horny' thing:

I have a great commercial idea for you.

Design a burqa with NO eye-holes in it, but with a built-in GPS + LCD screen + Browser + Google Earth + additional software.

Moslima's can go out and their unseen winks can not seduce the male Muslims. That would put the Saudi cleric to rest.

We still have the problem of the female curvature inside the burqa while walking. That could make men horny. There should be an inbuild lightweight skeleton to form a rectangular... form.

Don't for one second think that there isn't a chance it might happen. After all, who would have predicted that Gillette would put five blades in a razor?! (That link is of course old news, but the commentary is hilarious.)

Here's that video:

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Update 2:
The one-eyed veil has a problem - every time the woman blinks, it will look like she's winking, which of course will mean that Saudi men will be forced to rape her (that is why they have these ridicuolous religious laws, right?). The fun continues here, with a solution which will have the Saudis thinking 'why didn't we think of that' (in Arabic, naturally).